Are you sure you want to split up? Read this before you divorce!
If you’ve reached the stage where you are calling your marriage into question, it’s time to take a deeper look at what is involved in the divorce process. For unmarried couples who live together, the legalities are quite different when it comes to splitting up. However, married couples face a different set of issues and can be unprepared for what lies ahead. If you are undecided whether divorce is the best route, pause for thought by considering some of the below factors.
- Understand the legalities of divorce
When you got married you entered into a legal contract with your spouse which sets out rights and responsibilities for both. When you divorce, all related legal matters need to be resolved. If you can mutually agree on finances and children-related issues you do not have to go to court. If you cannot reach an agreement, the courts will divide financial assets for you. Also in the UK, joint custody of children is commonly granted. Consider if the latter is something that you want, and will be good for you and your family, and prepare financially too. This means documenting all incomings and outgoings, e.g., bank statements, bank account details and if necessary, business documents. Both spouses will be asked to fully disclose all finances during a divorce so be prepared for this.
- Consider the impact on children
When children are involved in any form of parental separation, it is difficult. In divorces, it can be especially hard due to the potential conflict on money matters, living arrangements and shared custody. Think about how difficult things could become and how this could impact your child. For example, should you wait until your teenager’s exams are over until you have ‘the conversation’ with your spouse? On the other hand, if you are in an abusive relationship, divorce may be the sensible option to free your children from living in a toxic environment.
- Know how matrimonial assets are split
In a divorce, all matrimonial assets will need to be divided. This includes the family home, and any other properties, e.g., holiday or rental home. It also includes savings, pensions, investments and business interests. Although it can be straightforward in some cases, disagreements can easily flair up when financial discussions come into the equation. Despite courts beginning with a 50/50 split approach, certain factors can change this equation, for example, if one party has sole custody of children, if some of the assets are non-matrimonial or if one party’s financial needs are greater than the other. Circumstances of both will be taken into account.
- Think about your future
Finally, consider where you want to be in your life five or ten years from now. It’s a profound thought, but a crucial one. Think about what is important to you, the choices you want to have, the ambitions you want to achieve and the lifestyle you want to enjoy. Think about how realistic that is with your spouse. Also think about whether it is a good time in your life to go through a divorce. Sometimes, relationship counselling can provide a safe platform for spouses to be more open about their feelings, helping to resolve problems. But you will need to be prepared to be honest and open.
Conclusion
Divorce proceedings can be complex, and it’s important to recognise this before you opt to officially part ways with your spouse. The financial and emotional implications can be long standing too. If you are sure you want to split up and divorce, while you shouldn’t stay in an unsafe or difficult marriage, take time to weigh up all the consequences.
